Mother’s Day is often a celebration of love and appreciation, but for children who have lost their mum, it can be an incredibly difficult time. While others are making cards or planning surprises, bereaved children may feel a deep sense of sadness, confusion or even anger. As a parent or carer, you might wonder how best to help them navigate these emotions. It’s not an easy task, but with understanding and thoughtful support, you can guide your child through grief on Mother’s Day.

Mother’s Day can trigger a wide range of emotions in grieving children. They might feel sadness over their loss, anger at the unfairness of the situation, or confusion about how to express these feelings. Some children may even feel guilt for enjoying parts of the day or jealousy toward friends who still have their mums.

It’s important to remember, however, that children do grieve differently depending on their age and developmental stage. Younger children might not fully understand the permanence of loss and may ask repetitive questions about their mum. School-aged children may struggle to express their emotions, sometimes acting out or withdrawing instead. Teenagers might internalise their grief, processing it privately and appearing distant.

Understanding these differences can help you provide the right kind of support for your child’s unique needs.

Grief can feel overwhelming, especially on a day like Mother’s Day. Helping your child feel safe and supported during this time is crucial.

Encourage Open Conversations About Grief

One of the most helpful things you can do is to let your child know it’s okay to talk about their feelings. Use open-ended questions like, “How are you feeling about Mother’s Day?” or “What memories of Mum make you happy?” This invites them to share as much or as little as they’re comfortable with.

How To Let Children Express Their Emotions Without Judgement 

When your child does open up, listen without interrupting or trying to fix their feelings. Avoid phrases like “Don’t be sad” or “You’ll feel better soon.” Instead, validate their emotions by saying things like, “It’s okay to feel upset” or “I’m here for you.” Creating this non-judgemental space can help them feel safe to grieve

Every child processes grief differently, and their needs can vary widely depending on their age. Tailoring your approach to their developmental stage can help ensure they feel supported and understood.

For Younger Children – Simple Language & Comfortable Rituals

Young children may need help understanding their feelings and the concept of loss. Use clear, simple language to explain that their mum is no longer here but that it’s okay to miss her. Comforting rituals like lighting a candle or looking through photos together can provide a tangible way for them to express their grief.

For School-Aged Children – Expression Through Art, Writing Or Talking

Children in this age group might benefit from creative outlets like drawing pictures, writing letters to their mum or sharing memories. These activities can help them articulate their feelings when words are hard to find.

For Teenagers – Respecting Privacy Whilst Offering Support

Teenagers often need more space to process their emotions. Let them know you’re there for them without pushing them to share. Respect their boundaries while also checking in gently, offering to listen or help in ways they feel comfortable with.

Memory-Making – Scrapbooks, Letters & Pictures

Encourage your child to create something that honours their mum. A scrapbook filled with photos, a heartfelt letter or a drawing can serve as a keepsake and a way to channel their emotions into something positive.

Rituals – Lighting Candles, Planting Trees & Sharing Stories

Rituals can provide comfort and a sense of connection. Lighting a candle, planting a tree in her memory or taking a moment to share stories about their mum can be a meaningful way to mark the day.

Crafts & Writing Prompts – Journaling & Making Cards

Creative activities like journaling or making a Mother’s Day card for their mum can help children express their feelings. Even though their mum can’t physically receive these gifts, the act of creating them can be deeply therapeutic.

Not all children will feel ready to discuss their grief, and that’s okay. Respect their silence while letting them know that support is always available. You might say something like, “I’m here whenever you want to talk, but it’s okay if you don’t feel like it right now.”

Here are some additional tips to support them.

• Provide Quiet Companionship – Sitting with your child while they engage in another activity, like drawing or watching TV, can help them feel supported.
• Offer Creative Outlets – Suggest non-verbal ways of processing emotions, such as painting, journaling or playing music.
• Be Patient & Consistent – Remind them that it’s okay to share their feelings whenever they’re ready.
• Model Emotional Openness – Share your own feelings in a gentle way to show them that expressing emotions is normal and healthy.
• Encourage Movement – Physical activities like walking, dancing or sports can help release pent-up emotions in a non-verbal way.

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, your child might need additional help to cope with their grief. If they show signs of prolonged sadness, withdrawal or difficulties at school, it may be time to consider professional support. At The Laura Centre, we provide grief counselling in a safe environment for your child to process their emotions with trained professionals. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength and a step toward healing.

Grief on Mother’s Day can be an overwhelming emotion for your child. But with patience, understanding and love, you can help them find moments of comfort and connection, keeping their mum’s memory alive.

If you need help and supporting following the loss of a child, parent or sibling, remember you can turn to The Laura Centre.