People often talk about grief as though it’s purely emotional. They talk about sadness, crying and missing the person who has died.

What people don’t talk about as often are the physical symptoms that can come with grief, including panic attacks.

If you’ve experienced one, you’ll know how scary it can feel. But in reality, grief panic attacks are much more common than many people realise.

After someone dies, it’s not unusual to feel like the world is a much less safe place than it was before.

Losing someone important can change the way your brain responds to everyday situations. Things that never worried you before might suddenly feel overwhelming, and your body can become much more sensitive to stress.

Sometimes that anxiety builds up slowly. Other times, it can hit all at once.

A racing heart, tight chest or feeling breathless can quickly make your brain think something is wrong. In response, your body releases even more adrenaline, making those physical symptoms feel even stronger. That’s why panic attacks can seem to come out of nowhere and become so intense so quickly.

Although it might not feel like it in the moment, a grief panic attack isn’t a sign that something is seriously wrong with you. It’s your body’s alarm system reacting to the stress and uncertainty that often comes with bereavement.

Not everybody experiences panic attacks in exactly the same way, but there are some common symptoms.

During a grief panic attack, you might notice –

• Your heart beating very quickly
• Feeling like you can’t catch your breath
• Tightness in your chest
• Feeling shaky or dizzy
• Sweating
• Feeling sick
• Tingling in your hands or face
• Feeling detached from what’s happening around you
• A sudden fear that something terrible is about to happen

Because these symptoms can feel so intense, some people worry they’re having a heart attack. However, they do pass.

Panic attacks are your body’s response to anxiety rather than a sign that something more serious is happening within.

When a panic attack starts, it can feel as though you have no control over the situation.

These techniques won’t stop a panic attack straight away, but they can help your body settle and make it easier to get through.

Box Breathing

One of the quickest ways to help your body settle is to slow your breathing down. Next time you feel a panic attack come on, try this simple technique –

• Breathe in through your nose for four seconds
• Hold your breath for four seconds
• Breathe out slowly for four seconds
• Hold for another four seconds
• Repeat this four or five times, or until your breathing begins to slow down

Slowing your breathing tells your nervous system that you’re safe, which can help reduce some of the physical symptoms of a panic attack.

The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique

Panic attacks can make your thoughts race, but grounding techniques can help shift your focus back to the present moment. Try naming –

• 5 things you can see
• 4 things you can touch
• 3 things you can hear
• 2 things you can smell
• 1 thing you can taste

Focusing on your surroundings can help interrupt the cycle of panic and remind your brain that you’re safe.

Focus On Something You Can Feel

During a panic attack, it’s easy to believe the worst. You might think you’re about to faint, stop breathing or that something is seriously wrong with you, even though those thoughts are being driven by the panic itself.

Choosing one physical sensation to focus on can help interrupt those thoughts and bring your attention back to the present moment. You could try –

• Holding a cold drink or ice pack
• Running your hands under cool water
• Pressing both feet firmly into the floor
• Wrapping yourself in a soft blanket
• Holding a smooth stone, stress ball or another object you can focus on

The aim is to give your brain something real and tangible to focus on while the panic begins to settle.

Ride The Wave

Panic attacks often feel like they’ll keep getting worse and worse, but they don’t. Like a wave, they build, reach a peak and then gradually begin to settle. The hardest part is trusting that your body knows how to calm itself down.

Instead of trying to make the panic disappear immediately, focus on getting through the next minute. Keep breathing slowly, use one of the grounding techniques and remind yourself that the feelings won’t stay this intense forever.

You don’t have to stop the panic. You just have to let it pass.

After you’ve had a panic attack, it’s completely understandable to worry about having another one.

Some people even start avoiding certain places or situations because they’re scared another panic attack might happen. While that feeling is understandable, avoiding everything that makes you anxious can sometimes make the fear feel even bigger.

Although there’s no guaranteed way to stop panic attacks completely, there are things that can help reduce how often they happen and make them feel easier to manage over time.

Keep Some Routine In Your Day

Grief can turn life upside down. But keeping some familiar routines, whether that’s going to school, seeing your friends, playing sport or walking the dog, can help create a sense of stability.

You don’t need every day to look the same, but having some structure can help your brain feel less on edge.

Take Care Of The Basics

When you’re grieving, it’s easy for things like sleep, eating and drinking enough water to slip down the list of priorities.

But your body and mind are closely connected. Feeling exhausted, hungry or drinking lots of caffeine can all make the physical symptoms of anxiety feel stronger, which can make panic attacks more likely.

Small things, like eating regular meals or getting an earlier night when you can, really can make a difference.

Learn What Triggers Your Panic

Sometimes panic attacks seem to happen out of nowhere. Other times, there are patterns.

You might find they happen before school, around anniversaries, when you’re already feeling stressed or after talking about the person who died.

Noticing these patterns isn’t about avoiding them forever. It’s about understanding yourself better so panic attacks feel less unexpected and a little easier to manage.

Having the occasional panic attack after a bereavement can be a normal part of how your body responds to grief. But if they’re happening regularly, affecting your sleep, stopping you from going to school or making you avoid everyday situations, it’s a good idea to ask for some extra support.

At The Laura Centre, we support children and young people following the death of a parent or sibling. If you’re under 18, a parent or carer can refer you for support. If you’re 18 or over, you can refer yourself directly.

You can also find advice and support from organisations including YoungMinds, Child Bereavement UK and the NHS, all of which provide information about anxiety, panic attacks and bereavement.

Remember, you don’t have to wait until things feel overwhelming before asking for help. The earlier you talk to someone, the sooner you can start finding ways to make grief panic attacks feel more manageable.

To get help and support from The Laura Centre, call us on 0116 254 4341 or email info@thelauracentre.org.uk.